8 Steps to Make a Plan After an Unexpected Pregnancy

Learning of an unexpected pregnancy can feel intimidating and overwhelming. Regain control by learning more about what next steps may look like. 

1. Process Your Feelings

First, give yourself permission to process your emotions. People can respond to news of an unexpected pregnancy in a wide range of ways. Some find comfort in taking time to themselves to process, while others immediately jump into action to figure out next steps. Whatever your reaction or emotions, it’s essential to recognize and process these feelings thoughtfully. 

Find time and space to discover how you process best. Reflective practices like journaling or meditation can help you identify your emotions and learn to manage them. Talking with trusted friends or family members who can offer support can also give you insight into what you’re feeling and experiencing.

2. Talk to Your Doctor

Next, it’s important to schedule an appointment with your healthcare provider. A medical professional can confirm the pregnancy, discuss your health, and offer sound advice for your best health and wellness. At this appointment, available options and next steps may also be explained.



If an appointment seems intimidating or overwhelming, consider asking a safe person to attend with you for support. Thinking of questions to ask or topics you want to know more about can also be helpful for a successful visit. Remember, your health and well-being are the priority.

3. Define Your Core Values

Taking time to identify your “north stars” is a critical next step before exploring options. When you recognize what values and beliefs are most important to you, you can better make decisions that are true to yourself. 

Take time to think about what matters most to you. Reflect on your support network, beliefs, lifestyle, and short-term and long-term goals. Try to create a list of 10 core values in order of what is most important to you. As you consider your options, you can use this list to compare how each aligns and how it would fit with your beliefs, allowing you to take next steps with confidence.

4. Explore Your Options

Then, explore all the paths available to you. During an unexpected pregnancy, there are often three options: parenting, adoption, or abortion. Learn more by researching, asking questions, and weighing your pros and cons. Your options may vary by state. Reliable resources are available online, and often locally as well. 

Support is available regardless of what you choose. Support groups, local organizations, and mental health counseling can make up a strong network virtually or in-person.

5. Keep Communication Open

Keeping communication open and honest with those involved or affected is essential. This can include your partner, family, or close friends. Talking with these people can offer a space to share thoughts and feelings and a sense of connection.

Healthy communication can happen when the people involved respect each other’s boundaries. While it can be difficult for others to know what to say at times, you should never feel pressured or judged.

6. Take Care of Yourself

As you journey and overcome challenges, make sure to make time for self-care. Despite the emotional and physical changes an unexpected pregnancy can bring, it’s important to eat well, stay hydrated, get rest, and take time for activities that bring you peace and joy. 

Finding a way to stay active through early pregnancy can reduce stress and improve your mood. Move in the way that feels best for you. Talking walks, practicing yoga, or gentle trips to the gym may be good options. Practicing mindfulness and taking time to relax also gives your mind a rest, which is critical. However you care for yourself, taking steps toward wellness is never wasted.

7. Plan for the Future

After exploring your options and giving yourself time to process, evaluate and plan for each. Consider the following questions: 

• What would need to change if I chose this option? What could stay the same?
• How does this option compare to my core values? 
• How do I feel about this path? 
• What resources or support systems would I need for this option? 
• What would each step of this path involve? 

Knowing each option, your values, and how each path feels to you can empower you to move with confidence. A step-by-step plan provides direction and can help you feel more in control of your future. 

8. Find Support

Facing an unexpected pregnancy can be challenging, but by processing your feelings, consulting with your doctor, defining your core values, exploring your options, keeping communication open, taking care of yourself, and planning for the future, you can navigate this journey with confidence and clarity. 

Better Clarity offers self-guided activities that can help you process and discover your best next steps. Remember, you are not alone, and there is support available to help you make informed and value-aligned decisions.